I Don't Like You Either

Needful Diversions: It's Halloween, So Here's a Terrifying Cackling Retromercial

by The Puppet Mistress | Via Rumproast.

Polling News for the Faint-Hearted Progressive

by Blue Stockings | This is why I try to ignore polls and commentary on polls.  What's the point in false reassurance NOW if it means that you are confronted unprepared with REAL reality later?  What's the point in making yourself sick with anxiety NOW only to find later that it was all---to quote (partially) Palin---"for naught"?

Marc Ambinder reports on the jazzed up Rick Davis, all in a lather of excitement at the way McCain campaign dirty tricks are bringing it home.

A "jazzed up" Rick Davis enthused that John McCain is the middle of "the greatest comeback  you've seen since John McCain on the primary."

Davis, on a conference call with reporters, said that the campaign has had "the best ten days of polling" since the convention.

"We think we've shaken off the effects of the financial collapse that have suppressed our numbers prior to the last debate. Our own data has us dead even in the state of Iowa."

The dead panned Ambinder remarks, parenthetically, "(Davis said that the Obama campaign's data was also close in Iowa -- although the Obama internal polling gives Obama a double-digit advantage.)"

We Don't Like You Either: Scary Rictus-Grinning Bill Kristol (The Daily Show Interview)

Talk about your Halloween horror shows....

HuffPost:

Bill Kristol knocked his own paper, the New York Times, on "The Daily Show" last night, and repeated his prediction that John McCain will win the White House on Tuesday.

Jon Stewart joked with the error-prone Kristol, who he has mocked before, "You can't look at past performance as a predictor, otherwise you wouldn't be, obviously, still a pundit."

"You're reading The New York Times too much, Jon," Kristol told Stewart, only for Stewart to remind him that he works there. "Oh, it's a very fine newspaper — on one day of the week.

Snark O' the Day: Little Elmers Everywhere

by Teh Nutroots | Deb C at our sister blog some time ago compared McCain and Obama to Elmer and Bugs.   In fact she has been calling wingnuts "Elmers" for the last couple of years.  They keep doing the same thing harder, even when it's clear it ain't working.  Maybe they are all insane and it wasn't as obvious when everything was going their way.  I guess it's an analogy that's occurred to a lot of us.

Presented for your consideration:  The Corner at NRO. 

Anyway I gotcher snark o' the day right here.

Poll after poll and focus group after focus group reveal that not only have attacks on Obama's character turned off those vital on-the-fence independents, but they may be the single biggest reason that the campaign has squandered what was a close race not that many weeks ago and is not making headway in the voter-rich Philadelphia 'burbs where voters are far more concerned about the economy.

Yet there they were referring to Obama as "an old-fashioned liberal" who would be "redistributionist in chief" if elected, would "lose the war" in Iraq and, horror of horrors, is "interrupting the World Series for an infomercial."

They still don't get it.  And never will.  (Kiko's House)

Yep.  While everyone else is gritting their teeth to stiffen the upper lip against the daily assault of bad economic news, they're jumping up and down at Toon Town rallies, scarlet faced and spluttering, "You Wascally Wabbit!" or swearing incoherently while firing their tiny, ineffectual guns.  The overgrown kids constituting the 24 percenters--who are the only people who show up for McCain/Palin rallies--laugh uproariously, stomp their feet, and applaud.  They're the kids who identified with Elmer and Yosemite Sam.   

Meanwhile, Bugs has calmly wandered off the screen and is busy elsewhere.  Win, lose, or draw, he's not going anywhere.

This is how come any moderate Republicans or on-the-fence independents out there who are still on the fence and are leaning McCain-ward ought to be very, very nervous. 

We've had eight years of an administration that's exploited the anger and fear of the nation's least rational (i.e., "the base") and proved over and over again that when that doesn't work, all they know how to do is to splutter and jump up and down. 

Ask yourself this: Do we need four more years of President Elmer and VP Yosemite Sam?

Rachel Maddow Interviews Obama

Another excellent interview for posterity.

part 1:

Joe the Plumber: Too Far Right for Fox?

We missed this, so here it is now:  Shep Smith of Fox News gives Joe the Plumber the big eye roll.

The Joe the No Show Haiku Project

by Damozel | Okay, everyone's read about Joe the No Show and has seen this:

But we  thought Ambinder's poetic tribute was a whole ship full of awesome, and maybe you didn't see that:

"Joe's with us today,"
Joe. Where are ya? Where is Joe?
Is Joe here with us?

Sadly, he has now been called out by Progressive Accountability---rightly---for calling it a haiku when it is NOT a haiku. 

CLAIM - Marc Ambinder Claims He Has Written a Haiku

FACT - A Haiku is 5-7-5, Ambinder dangerously misleads the American people by writing a "Haiku" that is 6-7-5.

Statement - "With only five days until the election this misuse of Japanese poetry could unravel the very fabric of American democracy.  We immediately demand that the first line be amended to "Joe's with us today" to comply with the use of syllables that the American people deserve and expect from The Atlantic."

I suggest these changes:

Joe?  Where did you go? today....
Joe. Where are ya? Where is Joe?
Is Joe here with us?

I think this is even more plangent than the original.

Colbert Joins Other Prominent Republicans in Endorsing Obama

Heh.

Right-Wing Jabberers Gloat, Moralize Over Murder

by Teh Nutroots | You might have heard the horrific story of HuffPost blogger Carol Anne Burger's brutal murder of her lover.  What you probably need to top it off is a good round of sanctimony and hypocrisy from Teh Right, courtesy of Roy Edroso.   

The paradox of wingnuts:  Even when they're as wrong as they can be, they're always so Right-eous.

Snark O' the Day: John McCain, Cocktail Weenie

Attaturk:

We've learned repeatedly during this campaign that the ever tone-deaf McCain drops certain phrases like anvils. From "my friends" to "I'm a Maverick" to "Joe the Plumber" his ability to turn quaint into quackery has been a sight to behold.

But the oft turned phrase "Georgetown Cocktail Parties" that McCain claims to rebel against and set up as a qualification for Palin is amongst the dumbest.

Who has been a bigger fixture on "the hot-barbecued sauced weenie on a toothpick and crab dip circuit" than John Sidney McCain the Third?

Besides, one thing we've learned about Palin, if she showed up at a party thrown by Sally Quinn, you know she'd bring whatever random daughter who isn't pregnant to go with her and put the whole tab on the State of Alaska.

82 Year Old Helen Philpot Kicks Some "Undecided" Ass

by Blue Stockings | . As the lady says, If You Are Undecided, You’re Not Paying Attention.  (McArdle and Althouse, take note).   In answer to a plangent inquiry from an undecided voter who can't decide how to decide, Helen writes:

Oh Cecilia, bless your heart.  We have only been at this for two years, sweetheart.  There were over 40 debates during the primaries and most recently we have had three Presidential debates and one Vice Presidential debate.  Honey, I trust you can read.  Please do because this is important.  And I am not trying to be mean or dismissive...

Jon Stewart Interviews Barack Obama

What is it the kids say?  It's FULL OF WIN.  Yeah!

The Daily Show: How Sharper than a Serpent's Tooth is an Ungrateful Rogue

Another Awesome Campaign Ad: "Whassup"

Gawker:

Remember those Budweiser "Whasssssssssupppppppppppp!!!" ads, that made you want to crush and kill everyone in your path? Yes, well someone has put the idea to use for the sake of good.

Ron Howard's Awesome Obama Ad

With Andy Griffith and the Fonz!

See more Ron Howard videos at Funny or Die

In the New York Times: Mother Love

by Blue | Speaking of moms:  Man.  Why is The New York Times doing these columns anyway? 

A third grader's mom discusses her feelings of anger and jealousy and a mix of other things I don't want to think about too closely when she discovers that some little third grade girl has written "I [heart] Oedipus" (<not his real name) on a bathroom wall.  When the son finds out, he is--to the mom's relief--devastated.   

“Someone wrote my name on the girls’ bathroom wall,” he mumbled. His little shoulders sagged with the weight of being in the third grade.

“How does that make you feel?” I asked.

“Horrible.” He pushed his hair out of his eyes then came to me. His lunch pail banged into my backside while he leaned his head into my belly...

What Would Your Name be if Sarah Palin Were Your Mom?

by Damozel | Heh.  What's your Palin name? I personally like "Jeep Pike Palin."

Biden's Orlando Interview

by The Puppet Mistress |  I'm going to agree with Thers:

Pretty much all you need to know about why the GOP is losing this election is to be found in the high-fiving among "conservatives" about this interview where a ridiculous local TV host from Orlando asks Joe Biden completely asinine leading wingnut questions about why Barack Obama is just like Karl Marx. Biden came across like a grownup; the interviewer looked like, well, someone from the Onion News Network, only not funny and all too real.

The only part where I disagree is this:  the self-satirizing interviewer was funny.  I doubt it did Biden any harm with non-Republicans.

Needful Diversions: In these Stressful Times, Please Enjoy this Video of a Baby Beluga Getting a Tongue Rub from the Trainer

Via Cute Overload.

Colbert Interviews David Frum!

Frum says McCain can't win; though Obama can lose.  He shares his plan for a new consrvative comeback because he has no sense of humor or irony.

Colbert:  "Love does not alter when it alteration finds."  Heh.

Wow, this is kind of a strange interview--- especially given Frum's criticisms of Comedy Central and of Colbert specifically.

McCain is Getting Tired (Two Embarrassing-in-Two-Entirely-Different-Ways Misfires)

When my mom does it, she calls it "having a senior moment."  Er, not that she's ever slipped up and said this:

Backwards "B" Girl Lied About Mugging; Drudge Gets Pwned?

by Teh Nutroots | Ashley Todd, the McCain volunteer in Pennsylvania who alleged she was mugged by a black Barack supporter at an ATM---and that he carved a backwards "B" on her cheek (backwards like it would have been if someone was looking in a mirror while carving it)---was lying.  At least that's what the police say. 

Wonkette's been on it and all over it:

BREAKING: McCAIN CUT-NUT MADE IT UP!

NICE TRY, FRAUDBOT!   

A Children’s Treasury Of Ashley Todd Updates   

McCain Cut-Nut Gains YouTube Pals   

Racial Mugging Victim Helpfully Twittered Her Terrible Tale

GOP Gal Claims Savage Negro Mugged Her … For Obama!

Wonkette:  "Happy Willie Horton Day, everyone. We will predict this story will fully unravel in about 48 hours. Weird times."

Daily Show: "Project Beltway"

Are the Palin family "a bunch of grifters"?

SNL: Ferrell as Bush Edorses Palin; Fey as Palin Explains Role of VP

"My God, you're folksy!....For awhile I was trying to be folksy, but after awhile it just came off douchey." 

Chris Matthews Roughs Up McCain's Nancy Pfotenhauer

Heee hee hee hee heee heee heee heee.  He makes Pfotenhauer watch the clip of Palin (once again failing to understand what the VP does) not once but twice!

Jezebel has a piece called  Dear Nancy Pfotenhauer: Please Wipe That Smile Right Off Of Your Face.  Tweety wipes it off for her. 

Ladies in Red: Bachmann & Palin Both in Trouble?

by Blue Stockings | First, check out Bill Maher's dis:

Then check out these reports of current woes:

Oopsie: New York Post forced to Retract the Lobster-and-Caviar Obama Story

by Blue Stockings | ....and hints darkly at condign punishment to be inflicted upon its source.  Via Memeorandum:

THE source who told us last week about Michelle Obama getting lobster and caviar delivered to her room at the Waldorf-Astoria must have been under the influence of a mind-altering drug. She was not even staying at the Waldorf. We regret the mistake, and our former source is going to regret it, too. Bread and water would be too good for such disinformation.  (NY Post)

I don't see why they're so upset about this particular piece of disinformation, but anyway. I wonder who told them it and what will happen to him or her?   "[O]ur former source is going to regret it too." 

Here's what the Murdoch-owned paper had published in its gossip column:

"Though he's battling GOP accusations that he's an Ivy League elitist, Barack Obama has a lifestyle of the rich and famous," the report read. "While he was at a meeting at the Waldorf-Astoria at 4 p.m. Wednesday, Michelle Obama called room service and ordered lobster hors d'oeuvres, two whole steamed lobsters, Iranian caviar and champagne, a tipster told Page Six."  (Salon)

Which....come on.  As Alex Koppelman says at Salon, really?  Iranian caviar?  Lobsters and champagne?  That is so lame.   It's like the person who made the story up picked the most obviously expensive food on the planet.  (No arugula?)   It's like...we all know we can't afford the lobster or the imported caviar. That's just dumb.

Palin Still Thinks that the Vice President is in Charge of the Senate

by Blue Stockings | DDay: "Sarah Palin, proving that even local interviewers can make her look bad."

Christ, couldn't someone have taken her gently aside and read the Constitution to her by this time?  Though I get the impression that with Palin, it wouldn't help much:  facts that aren't compatible with her preconceptions probably slip right out of her consciousness again...or such is my preconception.  As Senate majority leader Harry Reid told Think Progress, this is the second time she's said it.  "While the Vice President presides over the Senate, he or she is not in charge of it,"  he amplified.  (Think Progress)

Civics is hard!

Yesterday, Gov. Sarah Palin (R-AK) sat for an interview with KUSA, an NBC affiliate in Colorado. In response to a question sent to the network by a third grader at a local elementary school about what the Vice President does, Palin erroneously argued that the Vice President is “in charge of the United States Senate“:

Q: Brandon Garcia wants to know, “What does the Vice President do?”

PALIN: That’s something that Piper would ask me! … [T]hey’re in charge of the U.S. Senate so if they want to they can really get in there with the senators and make a lot of good policy changes that will make life better for Brandon and his family and his classroom. (Think Progress; emphasis in original)

Hilarious.  Obviously, Palin didn't give Piper a chance to explain it. 

Conservative Mayor of London Endorses Obama

by The Puppet Mistress | Boris Johnson, the conservative Mayor of London, has come out in support of Barack Obama in a Tory newspaper and his ingenuous arguments in support are a treat.  Has anyone told Limbaugh?

He starts off with a Wildean crack at W, though the follow-through is a bit weak:

The Daily Show on "Real America"

Jon Stewart is on to Colin Powell and the two Virginias (real and unreal)! "Even if John McCain doesn't get elected, he'll still be president of the real America that matters."