The Nutterdammerung ("Twilight of the Wingnuts: the Opera") Continues: Limbaugh vs. Gingrich

 by Teh Nutroots |  The scene opens on the barren rocks and fallen towers of the Land of Olimbo.  Dressed as a donkey with the ears, tusks, and trunk of an elephant, the God Bipartisan steps forward to sing in a somber baritone the opening aria, "In no world but a fallen could such a land exist." As he ominously withdraws, swishing his head from side to side, the Princes and Powers of Farright, who have gathered outside the Cave of Rush Olimbo, the Gibbering Giant, chant defiance of the Curse that has fallen upon them ("Nay, Slide Not Silently Into Irrelevance"). 

As the chorus ends, former Bush-speech-writer Little Frum (counter tenor) emerges from stage Center Right. Standing in the huge shadow of the giant Rush O' the Limbo (bass), the Voice of the GOP, he sings a lengthy rebuke ("Shepherd, Let Not Thy Voice Out-bleat Thy Sheep"). Instead of deigning to respond, the Rush Olimbo turns his back and leads the Chorus of the Dittoheads in a mocking chorus of the comic ballad, "Bah!  Bah!  We Hear Thee -- NOT!") which grows louder until the raucous melody drowns out Frum's voice completely.  The Giant then blows clouds of cigar fumes over Little Frum, who abruptly vanishes in a particularly acrid puff of smoke.

But Rush has no time to enjoy his triumph. Looking up with an expression of fury and dismay, he hears the Gingrich Newt sing the first bars of a poignant reprise of  the Dissenters' Theme  ("Presume Ye Not to Crown Him King"):

You're irrational if you don't want the new president to succeed, because if he doesn't succeed the country doesn't succeed.... I don't think anyone should want the president of the United States to fail. I want some of his policies to be stopped....

But I don't want the president of the United States to fail. I want him to learn new policies....The fact is he has a large audience, the audience believes him, the audience calls their members, the audience has an effect. He's not the leader of the Republican Party.  (The Politico)

As the Gingrich's voice crescendoes in a climax of great power and beauty, Rush Olimbo blows his Mighty Bullhorn in a prolonged and threatening blast and begins singing in the intervals his own theme ("Aye, Ye Peasant Knaves and Rogues, Ye Wish"), backed by the Dittoheads:

I'm frankly getting tired of talking about Newt....

"I'm surprised by nothing when I'm dealing with people in the media who think they're in politics. ...

They are fly-by-night operators, and most of them stand for nothing until they see a poll about what the American people want, and then they go out and try to say one way or another what the American people want while trying to falsely hold onto an ideology at the same time — and you can't count on them. You can't depend on them. They will sell you out; they will throw you overboard to save themselves, faster than anything. And they'll use you on their way up as often as they can at the same time.

I mean, next week Newt could come out and profess his total admiration and love for me if it would serve his purposes...

They're running TV ads against me. Newt Gingrich wishes they were running TV ads against him. (The Politico)

The duet ends as the Giant once more sounds his Mighty Bullhorn, causing lightning bolts to shoot from the clouds.  The Gingrich plummets from the sky in a rain of  bullshit, vanquished.

 Olimbo raises his arms victoriously and sings the following recitative:

There isn't a leader of the Republican Party, Newt, and there won't be..until we have a presidential nominee in 2012.(The Politico)

The Dittoheads, clapping madly, enthusiastically sing their theme ("And So Say All of Us"), beautifully harmonizing with the Princes' and Powers' anthem ("All You Need is Rush"). 

But...what is this?  The chorus falls gradually and uncertainly silent as the spotlights reveal that Rush the Gibbering Giant has his foot planted firmly on the neck of the god Bipartisan, who twitches feebly beneath his weight.

And...scene!  The curtain falls.  The audience rises as one, and with ironic cheers fling rotten fruit and unwashed socks at the stage till their arms are tired.

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